I really should have just done the evening routines and gone to sleep, I really fucked up my sleeping pattern, and not to mention that the TV show triggered my bad memories from my stay in a mental ward. And I felt disappointed with my inability to do the most simplest things like brush my teeth and wash the dishes.
I got up about at ten o'clock this morning, took my morning medicines and went back to bed in my bathrobe to write into my diary.
I ended up sleeping for three hours, having bad dreams, and felt a bit sad about it, I could have done my morning routines and then cleaned up my apartment and gone to the gym.
It's always the same, when I go back to bed after taking my morning medicine and only want to nap for a while to gather some energy, and end up sleeping for hours.
I got up later, put on a t- shirt and a pair of pajama pants.
Later the day my brother called me and asked if it's okay for him to come over and assemble the drawer my dad had bought. I said it's fine, he said he's going to drink the rest of his coffee and then ride his bicycle over here.
Later he arrived and started constructing the drawer, I told him I am going to pop to the local supermarket to buy a bag of sugar, I cannot drink my coffee without milk and sugar.
My brother managed to assemble the drawer, but he got a small cut on his finger. I gave him a band- aid, after he left I went to the bathroom to take a dump. He rang the doorbell and said he had forgotten his gloves.
I put some stuff on the drawer and inside the drawers, and noticed that I had managed to spend most of the day without having any kind of crisis. Of course, I didn't do much housework and I didn't go to the gym, but then again, tomorrow is another day full of possibilities.
Sometimes I wonder about all the things I could do if it wasn't for my lack of motivation.