There are also days when I want to update, I am satisfied with my writing but erase it anyway when I feel like other people won't like it. I hate it, I should realize that I write only for my own amusement, not for whiny assholes. Oh but I'm a whiny asshole too, but at least I don't comment on entries I don't like: "Who the fuck cares that your pedigree poodle has a diarrhea? Spare us from the details."
I wish I could give up having dreams. I have been dreaming of attending grade school, because I have failed some classes. I have no motivation in completing them, and when I wake up, I feel like I don't want to face the day. I think the dreams are manifested from my miserable school years, and my bad motivation towards studying. I know that both studying and working is important, studying because of getting a job and working because of earning your living. Somehow I still cannot find enough motivation.
This morning, after the necessary routines I was checking my e- mails and updates and I was thinking of taking a shower and brushing my teeth, I suddenly felt sleepy. I felt as if the drowsiness was pushing me down, so I grabbed my cuddle blanket and went to sleep on the sofa.
I woke up when one of the counselors called me and asked me to come downstairs. I had known the home meeting would be today, but decided to go there only after they had called me and asked where I was.
I dressed up and brushed my hair and decided to scrub myself after the meeting and the home visit. I went downstairs, all of the ex- Francanians sans Okko were there. Even Viljami and Laura were there, despite not living in Kilterinrinne anymore. Quelle surprise, Naskali joined us. If you remember him, he's an Autist and very rarely shows up outside his apartment. He was wearing a magnificent Winnie the Pooh two- piece pyjama suit.
After the meeting, I went back home and waited for the counselors to show up. Once they showed up, we just talked about things and stuff and after they left, I took a shower and washed my face. I didn't feel like brushing my teeth.
I dressed up, wrote to my diary while waiting for my hair to dry; now that it's pretty short, bobbed style, I don't use my hairdryer, except after I have dyed my hair.
Which reminds me, I cut my hair a few days before I dyed it. You see, my hair is growing in layers, the top layer is shorter than the layer underneath, and I cut the layer underneath to make it match the top layer. Derp. Now I have dyed it, with the, um, can't remember the brand of the dye I used, but it's far more better than the fancy posh ones I have tried; at first they look dazzling, then the shine and then the colour fades into this carrot orange. I like the cheaper brand better as it never lets me down ~
I went down the Kitler hill to buy chocolate. The shops were crowded with customers, but there were short cashier lines. I grabbed two chocolate bars, and on the way to the cashier line I met Tiina- Maria, who was buying Lumene products for as a Mother's day present.
After purchasing the chocolate bars, I visited the book shop. They had some new Geepap diaries for sale; I'd like to buy them next week, but I'm afraid I can't make any extra purchases now that my weekly allowance is needed for food, hygiene and other basic needs.
I should call the Social Security Institution and ask when am I going to start receiving the extra welfare? The new law about takuueläke came to be in March, I have filled out the forms and other things, and I still haven't received it.
Which reminds me, I got a letter from Intrum Justitia, also known as a dunning letter, telling me that one of my bills has been unpaid. Which kind of weirds me out, as I have taken all of my bills to the social office to be paid! I rang the aforementioned industry, a woman speaking very poor Finnish told me to ring on Monday. Stupid social workers, they have fucked up again. It's certainly not my fault!
Once home, I stuffed my face full of chocolate and felt miserable, as you can probably see from my Fapbook and Twatter updates.
When I felt a little pepped up, I tried the new facial mask I had bought; Freeman's Feeling Beautiful mint&lemon. I used hair clips to keep stray hair away from my face, smeared the fresh- smelling light blue mask all over my face, avoiding my eyes and lips and also my neck because I forgot that the mask can also be used on neck. Well, good anyway because rinsing the stuff from my neck has proved to be a bit difficult.
After rinsing the stuff off my face with warm tepid water, I started doing housework; I wiped the desks and tables clean, hoovered the floor, washed laundry, changed my bedsheets, meanwhile both the window and the balcony door were open and now my apartment has a fresh smell. Tomorrow I will wash the dishes, beat the carpets, mop the floor and clean up the bathroom.
Later the day I went for a bike ride, I couldn't help noticing that biking doesn't feel as good as in my dreams.
Once home, I looked through the Transformers Rule 34 gallery, and tried not to wince.