February 9th, 2015

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I had an appointment with my doctor Teemu Z. at nine o'clock in the morning, I'm glad I was awake early (the nervous pain in my head kept me awake). I took my morning medicine, put on clothes and went back to bed to sleep a bit more until my cellphone alarm clock rang to remind me to get up and go see the doctor.

When walking to the health center, I was glad that the sun was up. While waiting for the appointment, I thought about there's a half- eaten bar of chocolate and liberal amount of coffee in my kitchen cupboard. The thought made me feel good.

Once in the health center, I told the doctor that I have been doing okay; my right eye is still a bit blurred, but I can see with it. The eczema is getting better and it didn't get inflamed. I still have this stinging pain in the nerves of my head, I can feel it at the right corner of my mouth, around my ear and in my scalp; I used to feel it momentarily, but now I feel it all the time.

Teemu looked at my right eye with a small light, and told me that I can take raise the dose of my painkillers into two pills in the evenings. We made a new appointment on next Monday, February 16th, at quarter to one in the afternoon. I'm glad that it's in the afternoon, there's no way I will be able to get up from the bed earlier.

I went back home and slept a bit more, my head hurting and having dreams that felt "intense", as if I was watching the Apocalypse happening. I kept on waking up between the dreams and wondering half- asleep why I slept so much, it felt as if I had stayed awake all night and had to sleep off the debt.

I got up in the afternoon and felt strangely content now that I didn't have any appointments left, so I could just relax all day.
I decided to go to Girls House, but then I looked around at my apartment and noticed the mess, so I decided to wash the dirty dishes, put fresh sheets into my bed, fold the laundry and put it to the cupboard, and once I left I took out the biological waste.

It was chilly outside and raining powdery snow.

I took the bus 56 to Mellunmäki, I checked the balance of my bank account on the ATM machine; I had enough money to buy two small jars of mint chocolate pudding to crank up my blood sugar.
I took the subway to Hakaniemi and went to the Girls House, where I sat around writing into my diary.

I went back to Myyrmäki on the bus 452, and now that I had some extra money I visited Citymarket in Myyrmanni to buy three cartons of orange juice, a carton of milk, some blackberries and two iced lattes.

Once back home, I spent most of the evening surfing on the Internet. I felt cold and unhappy.

In the evening I took a long warm shower, washed my hair and went to bed.
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