July 14th, 2015

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I had dreams about junior high again. Even if the dreams were quite colorful, they still made me unhappy. It's been well over a decade and I still can't forget all those bad memories of being bullied.

I had to practically force myself to do all the morning routines, but once I got a hang of it, it went pretty smoothly.

Later the day I called my dad and asked hir if I can come over; the back tire of my bicycle was half empty, and I had to fill it but I didn't have a bicycle pump of my own yet. Zie said it was okay.

I walk- pushed my bicycle to Raappavuori, my parents weren't home. I pumped the back tire full of air and made a cup of coffee, then I rode my bicycle back to Myyrmäki. I guess the back tire isn't punctured, because otherwise it would have been completely empty. The ride back to Myyrmäki went smoothly, and I decided to ride my bicycle more often and also purchase a bicycle pump of my own as soon as possible.

I had an appointment with my nurse at the psychiatric clinic at two o'clock in the afternoon, I spent some time in the shopping center and then went to the clinic.

During my appointment, Saija pointed out that I yawned a lot. Zie also told me that I might be able to go to the electroshock therapy after I have given a blood sample and a record of my heart rate, and when I go to the hospital for the therapy, I have to ask someone to take me back home after I wake up from the anesthesia, because there might be some complications.

I went home to write into my diary and knit a sock. Later the day I decided to go to downtown Helsinki. I took the bus 56 to Mellunmäki and then the subway to Kamppi; I went to Ruohonjuuri, my favorite eco- market, to plan what I am going to buy tomorrow. They didn't have trash bags except for biological waste, and they also didn't have scouring liquid, so I have to buy it from Citymarket.

I took the bus 452 to Myyrmäki, and I was home on time. I called my mother, zie told me they had been visiting my grandmother in Kangasala and they were on their way home.

Tomorrow I will receive money twice, the weekly allowance from the social office and the monthly allowance from my mother. I will buy food, hygiene products, underwear, a bicycle pump and perhaps some clothes. I will also go to the movies to see Mad Max: Fury Road.
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