March 17th, 2016


(no subject)

Last night I stayed awake all the way to the small hours when I heard my neighbour’s mail slots clatter when they received their newspapers.
I used my smartphone to surf on the Internet; I read the entries of my first LiveJournal account, and I was amazed at how creatively I could write despite not being so good at grammar.
Reading my old entries revoked many bittersweet memories. I’m glad they’re not bad memories anymore.

I fell asleep and had many dreams, more or less pleasant.
I kept on waking up many times in the morning, and I received another phone call from the psychiatric clinic; I was told that the appointment is moved to next week’s Tuesday at noon.

I got up at noon, took my morning medicine and dressed up. I felt a craving for chocolate, so I went to Citymarket to buy a bar of Marabou Japp.

Once back home, I took a long catnap. I got up at four o’clock in the afternoon.

I went to see my parents; I took the bus 571 to Raappavuori, once in my parents’ home, mom made me coffee. I ate two sugared donuts.

Later the day my dad came home, we had a nice evening. I went back home on the bus 574, and visited Citymarket to buy a peppermint- flavoured iced latte.

Once back home, I looked through my cupboards and drawers to find some stuff that’s useless to me, so I could give them to charity.
I found plenty of stuff, put them all into a big plastic trash bag, and took it to the UFF container. I was glad that it was finally emptied, but I couldn’t manage to stuff the whole bag into it.
Fortunately I keep a roll of smaller plastic trash bags in my ever so trustworthy backpack, so I divided the stuff into smaller bags and put them into the container, one by one.

I went to Myyrmanni to return bottles, I made seventy cents. I wanted to buy something, but it was getting late and most of the jewellery-, stationery- and toy shops were already closed for the day.

Once back home, I looked through my drawers and cupboards again and found even more stuff to give away. I felt so refreshed, like taking a huge dump, tee hee.

I took out the trash; when I stepped out of the corridor into the cold, dark, rainy night, I felt strangely happy, because the velvety darkness, the smooth feeling of chilly wind, and the raindrops on my hair made me recall a memory when I went to an art museum with my mom on the same kind of cold and dark and rainy evening.

As for the rest of the evening, I felt a slight mania. I took my evening medicine at nine o’clock; usually it takes about an hour before I start feeling sleepy, but this time I stayed awake for many hours, wandering around my apartment and stubbornly trying to find more stuff to give away to charity. I felt like nothing at all, empty and emotionless. I wasn’t conscious of the time or my surroundings.

I called my mother, we talked a bit and then she said: “Sleep well, and have beautiful dreams”. It made me feel happy.

I took a hot shower to relax myself, put on a nightie, and then I went to bed. I ate some chocolate, wrote into my diary, thought all kinds of thinky thoughts, and surfed on the Internet on my smartphone. I also had dry hiccups.