You deserve to be healthy, safe, loved, and very happy
28th May 2016
I don't write poetry
I always thought my story was a story of success When I faced trouble, I realized it was a story of survival I wanted to be beautiful inside and out And always be out and about I wanted to be brave, wise and kind Like the falling star that birthed me But day after day it proved to be really hard Then he grabbed my hand and said “Run, you clever girl, and be a poet” And I have been writing poems ever since “Write and write and keep on writing, Just make sure your life’s exciting”
I am not Tracy Berkowitz, and neither am I Estuary Palomino I am not a special and unique snowflake But neither am I crap or trash I am not a walrus, I am THE walrus And goo goo gajoob to you too, Mr. Nice Guy
Well no one is going to read anything else than the first poem Whoever was silly enough to invent creativity in the first place
I still remember when I was under ten years old, I tried imagining the perfect kind of outfit; a black shirt with silvery- glittery picture of a glamorous cat on it, and a fuchsia skirt with matching legwarmers. When I was a bit older, my new ideal outfit was jeans, denim jacket, a multi- coloured baseball cap, and a pair of huge sunglasses with my blonde hair on micro- braids, and of course, tattoo chokers. I also wanted to wear a plaid shirt and ride a skateboard. I am a part of the grunge generation, later to be called millennials.
I haven’t been to the gym or the natatorium for a while, I have either lost my motivation or such as yesterday when I simply forgot to go to the gym. I have taken up the habit of going to the gym or natatorium in the evenings, at the last minute, because I work better under pressure. To be honest, sometimes I wish I could just scrounge up motivation from somewhere so I could get my daily deeds done, especially in the mornings; make my bed, have a proper wash, stretch and exercise, have a healthy breakfast… not just sip on coffee and surf on the Internet in my bathrobe until my morning medicine kicks in and I start feeling sleepy and go back to bed.
I have been watching lots of Doctor Who on Netflix, the episodes with the 12th Doctor as portrayed by Peter Capaldi. I think he looks a bit like what Benedict Cumberbatch would look when he’s grown old. I ‘m very glad that even if the 12th Doctor looks a bit stern and serious, he still hasn’t lost his sense of humour or his bumbling attire. I didn’t feel like I would like the series with the 12th Doctor and Missy, I still haven’t got over my “11th Doctor’s mourning period”. But by now I have learned to love all the Doctors, I still wish I could see the Classic episodes.
I have been thinking about my favourite fandoms, the musical Starlight Express, the MMORPG game Team Fortress 2, the whole Transformers franchise, and now the vast universe of Doctor Who. I feel something like foreboding sadness when I think about how meh I feel about TF2 and TF, and someday I am going to start feeling meh about Doctor Who as well. I imagine them being dumped, forgotten, even if they did just fine and helped me become the person I am today. So that way they will never be forgotten.
The May flowers are blooming, there’s a real bouquet of scents every time I step outside to my home yard. I have also noticed that winter air smells a bit tingly, like a mint or static electricity, and the other seasons smell stuffy and warm like fresh soil.
My eczema is getting better, I have remembered to use all the lotions that my doctor prescribed me.
I have decided that from now on when I receive money, I am going to use it smartly on food, hygiene, underwear and such. If I have extra money, I can use it on jewellery or My Little Pony figurines or such.
Today I went to see my mother again, we had boiled cabbage for lunch and coffee and cinnamon rolls for dessert. When I was leaving I told my mother I love her, and she told me she loves me back. It made me feel so happy I felt like I was about to burst.
I took a bus back to Myyrmäki, once there I visited the pharmacy to buy a pocket- sized tube of Aqualan Duo basic lotion; it had to be pocket- size so I can carry it in my cosmetics bag. I also bought some pain killers because I have run out of them. I went to Citymarket and bought two boxes of interdental brushes, they were in discount.
Later the day I took a bus to Konala and went to Horror Shop. I had to visit Tattoo Dungeon in order to get a new piercing ring. I have three holes punched to each of my earlobes, and it’s always the same “middle hole” in my right earlobe where I have a “horseshoe” ring. One of the lock- balls always gets unscrewed and drops off, and it’s always the same one. So, Perkele fixed a new one into the piercing. We talked about stuff and joked around, and then I took a bus to Helsinki and went to a few shops.
I visited the UFF thrift store in Freda, and I was mighty disappointed to see that the blue Dirndl dress was nowhere to be found. I wonder who bought it, I rarely see people wearing that kind of clothing. I regained my positive attitude quickly enough and decided that at least I saved the money, and there will be plenty of other dresses that I can buy. Next Wednesday I will go for a shopping spree in my favourite thrift stores in Helsinki, the UFFs on Freda and Iso- Roba; I will buy a pair of peachy pink overall shorts, a pair of blue denim dungarees, yellow kimono pants, fuchsia nightshirt with a glittery picture of a girlish Angry Birds character on it, and I also want some sort of simple white maxi dress.
Once back home, I tuned on to Netflix and noticed that they have all kinds of amazing movies and shows and I still can’t figure out what to watch. I tried watching the BBC Sherlock Christmas special The Abominable Bride, but it gave me *feels* o’plenty. Then I made a feeble attempt at watching Mad Max 3: Beyond Thunderdome but I was kind of meh about it.
Tomorrow I will go to the World Village festival with Suvicita and Eleclya, and then I will tidy up my apartment. I have already washed three loads of laundry, replaced the towels, and taken the carpet and my mattress, pillow and blanket to the balcony for the night so they will be freshened. Tomorrow I will hoover every square inch of the floor, take out the trash, and take the mattress and carpet outside for dusting. I am sleeping on the sofa- bed tonight.
Current Mood: awake
Current Music:Tina Turner - We don't need another hero