7th June 2017

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The situation right nao

🦋 It’s kind of peculiar when you think about it; I have been doing better than ever, and still I feel depressed and anxious at times. Or more like, I am more conscious of my depressive and anxious feelings.
But I still live my life with great hope and joy, day after day, and do what I have to do.

🦋 I took every single one of my Dirndl dresses, except the blue embroidered one and the brown one, to the dressmaker to have them mended.
I have two blue dresses, a brown one, a purple one, a pink one, and a black one. I want them all to be mended, washed, and ironed when I go visit my grandmother next month; usually when I go visit her, I only wear my Dirndl dresses.

🦋 I had originally planned to go visit my grandmother this month, but I have my budget to reconsider; I have to pay for the mending of the dresses, send my friend’s gift package, restock on hygiene products, and stuff like that.

🦋 I also need to buy some more undies; 7 pairs of black tricot cycling shorts (to prevent my thighs from chafing, I don’t wear leggings during summer because they are too hot), 8 pairs of nightshirts (I have only three nightshirts, and they are already getting threadbare and smelly), 5 pairs of brassieres (I want to have eight pairs at minimum of each underwear, so I will have one for every day of the week, and one extra).
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It got better for me. I hope it gets better for you as well.

I have overcome my chocolate & iced coffee addiction.

I have lost my interest in frivolous spending.

I go out of my home every day.

I attend plenty of hobby groups.

I love helping others, and making others happy.

I keep my apartment tidy.

I eat healthily.

I have found my own style.

I think I am very pretty and adorable. I love my chubby tummy and my wiggly tights!

To put it this way, it got better.
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Updating from my parents' home :3c

Yesterday I received my weekly allowance. I went to the supermarket to buy food, and then to the stationery shop to buy two magic ink pens, one green and one purple.

Once back home, I had a terrible headache. Actually, I had had a terrible headache all day, ever since I got up from my bed. I took a few hot showers to make myself feel better, and then I started puking; I had eaten nothing but a tomato, and after I had thrown it up, I started spewing acrid bile.

Ever since I moved to this apartment where I live now, for about once in half a year I get these migraine attacks when I have a terrible headache and puke my guts out.

Today I felt a lot better, except it feels like my right ear is blocked and my left ear is halfway blocked. If it persists, I will go to the health center tomorrow morning.

Me and Mirette left at the same time, she went back to her own home and I went to my parents’ home for a sleepover. Mom had suggested that I can come over for one night, now that my father and brother were vacationing overseas.

I had packed only the necessary stuff; spare clothes, a bottle of basic lotion, and my laptop. I already keep my diary and a spare filled- up Dosett in my backpack, and I keep a spare toothbrush at my parents’ home for overnight visits.

I took a bus to my parents’ home. Once there, I had coffee and some snack, and later the day me and mother went to a shopping mall to look for new summery clothes for my mother. Later we bought ice creams, I got a chocolate sundae. Then we went grocery shopping.

Once back, I took a shower, warmed some tomato & goat cheese soup for dinner, and then went outside to the yard to write into my diary. I loved seeing how fluent my penmanship is, and how the ink flows like the tears of Jesus.

In the evening, me and my mother walked to the same grocery shop we had visited earlier, in order to get some exercise and fresh air, and because there was still something she needed to buy.

Once back at my parents’ home, I ate some snacks like cheese puffs and salmiakki- flavoured chocolate waffle bites, surfed on the Internet, and felt a lot better.

In the evening, mom cooked oatmeal porridge for supper, it tastes amazing when you put a small dab of butter on it. I brushed my teeth, dabbed lotion on my skin, put on my nighties, dressed my old bed in fresh, clean sheets, and went to bed.

Tomorrow morning I will go back to my own home. I will go to the health center to check what is wrong with my ears, if they are still blocked by then.
Then I will go to Lapland Spring, after that I might go to an art museum.
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